Thursday, August 20, 2009

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

DrTPS - Delhi POEMS

POEMS WRITTEN AT Delhi
during 2007 - 2008


Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Prof. KGS Writes

Prof. K. G. Sankara Pillai K.G. Sankara Pillai is one of Kerala’s finest poets. A recipient of the state and central Sahitya Akademi Awards in 1998 and 2002 respectively apart from many other awards. His poetry has been translated into Chinese, French, German and Sinhala. He has been editor of important literary journals: Prasakthi (a journal of radical political views, the third issue of which was confiscated by the police in 1974) and Samakaleena Kavita (1991-1996) devoted to poetry. He has also edited Penvazhikal, an important anthology of women’s poetry and feminist criticism in Malayalam. He worked in various colleges until his retirement in 2002 as Principal of Government Maharaja’s College, Ernakulam. He lives in Thrissur, Kerala.

CARE AND CURE
Portrait of the self as a traveller in Dr.T.P.Sasikumar’s Delhi Poems –LIFE of LOVE - generate a new poetic electricity. Self is the observer and the observed in the depths of these poems. We see the self as a nonstop traveller reading the time we live in by reading the mind and life of its own and the minds and lives of others. It reads everything around, in and out. Reads the minute throb of the heart; flames of desire and instinctual drives of the body. Success, failure, fame and wounds and pains are recorded in it. The self travels through the anxieties of the cities of chaos in continents of competitions and battles; dreams to have a companion to share everything and to regain the lost treasures, for the plus and minus of love. To be loved and guided by love. Darkness of grief, grievances, relations, slogans, given ideas and concepts, Gods, crowds of nonsense, illusions of paradise on a divided earth, and so many. Self goes on reading and travelling and examining the tensions and worries within. Through a series of verbal graphics of these poems the poet exposes the complex inscape and sickly soul of our time. We get the view that every word/step is constitutive of the self. But due to certain reasons beyond perception the construction of the self ceases to win over the self demolishing trends of the new civilisation. These poems unveil a vivid view that all voyages of the self are voyages to the self via a grown up but immature universe of desire and grief. An enlightened self, the first person narrator of these poems, lives to lift them up to a quite zone of repose and purification of mind. We reach an axiom: Travel is reading and reading is travel. Both enrich the therapeutic power of a creative mind. Every reader is a reader of the self. And Dr. Dr. T.P.Sasikumar, the poet, makes it clearer through his poems in this collection that he has greater faith in care and cure of the suffering human self.


Dr. Sasikumar begins his search and narration of the journey of the self right from ‘the story of my birth’; the story of one’s own origin .The poet traces the starting point of the journey of the self in the past to his father and mother . This is a normal way of seeing the origin. No mystification. No mythification. Dr. Sasikumar observes the physiological micro drama behind every birth – the battle of sperms to win a birth. To win a life. To weave a saga. Though it may be unknown to the newborn the first realisation of the self naturally is that of a winner. It paves a positive basis for all the forthcoming waves and layers of self-awareness. That pride of the winner becomes an innate energy of self confidence which later is to be manifested behind every motivation in addressing and advancing various urges, needs, dreams, dilemmas and all such future situations. The following lines of the first poem in this collection – the race for birth- certifies this.


“I can run and win the race
With anyone in this life

As I have won the race for birth.”


we can see here the birth of consciousness and in toto the rise of the mind .A fascinating fact revealed normally in the context of birth is that the answer of one plus one is another one ; self plus self is another self . In the genetic structures of every self we see the profound inscriptions of the fabric of inherited plurality of the selves. Seeing itself in the mirrors of life and times; in the actions reactions expressions and extensions of perceptions. As the seed of a response system; of a series of complex, complicated, complaints and complacencies.


'Where are you from?’ is an ancient question. A universal one. Deep and curious. A question with mysterious dimensions of physiology, psychology, cultural heritage, history, geopositions, and cosmology. A question asked by everyone to everyone. No origin is a singular phenomenon. Every origin is like the origin of a river, a culmination of various forces inherent in various orgos. Every self is passing through ages and spaces, individual and society, contexts and situations, love and battle, truth and myth, agony and ecstasy, of witnessing, partaking, experiencing, and creating new forms of energies and histories. These are the self-evident premises of the concept of the self as a traveller in Dr. Sasikumar’s poems. We see innumerable linear and vertical movements in it.



Majority lives and die without even having a glimpse of their own-self. Without listening to it. Without caring it or loving it. Without even feeling the unbearable lightness of their being as a void in history. They haven’t yet born into an awakened human space and time though they are watching movies, wearing costly garments for celebrations in cool banquet hall evenings and flying across oceans and continents as eminent preys of the crocodile grows in their own mud of greed. Dark Ages keep a black hole like hiding place in their self blindness. Just the opposite is the bright presence of a loving self; the essence of Dr. Sasikumar’s poetry. In one of these poems he refers to the searching for a magic formula to sparkle the mirror of the mind “to reflect the truth of the world in its original immensity and magnitude.” The searcher is not a romantic. He is realistic enough to dissect, demystify, and demythify the contemporary cultural practices and faith systems. He is very sure of the impossibility of such a magical formula to attain purity or liberation. It is repeatedly asserted in these poems that there is no such a miracle cleanser of mistakes and miseries and crimes in this world of remote powers. I think this position is the milieu of Dr. Sasikumar’s poetry. It is a spiritually enlightened linguistic arena of self awareness, self confrontation, and self renovation. It reminds us the taste of an ancient eastern wisdom that the construction of an alert self constructs a bold life. Writing about the necessity of self in a selfless world is a revolutionary mission. This daring wings make his poetry frank, credible, and flying. It doesn’t crawl.


Dr.T.P.Sasikumar’s poems are creative dialogues of the poet with himself and with the world in closed contexts of acute loneliness and sharp introspection. Most of them follows certain structural aspects of lyrical or dramatic monologues incorporating soliloquies of a consistent searcher of love and meaning of life and stray conversations of women in places of worship .These poems effectively befriend the reader in her/his inner bad times of crisis . They speak in a soft and sharp curative voice of concern and compassion. They do have a therapeutic effect on the perplexed minds. Words move around in Dr. Sasikumar’s poems with a sheer clinical vigil. They convey psycho-cultural messages for seeing hearing trialing analysing and updating one’s own inner life. These are all without any hidden agenda of the megalomania of a contemporary middle class intellectual. It can lift the reader from shallow levels of greed, guilt, dust and dirt of emotional complexities. These poems are spiritually rich with empowering elements like empathy, warmth of hope ; will to listen, love, dream and live ; willingness for regular renewal of sensibility to the age we exist, and power to convince and inspire fellow beings , the depressed slow walkers .


Qualities of this brand are rare and worthy both in art and life. Art of poetry always celebrates these creative features of a poetic persona as potential makers of profound vision and linguistic agnosticism. Knowing oneself as central to all forms cognition. Knowing oneself in all its emotional and intellectual possibilities and limitations, conscious or unconscious tendencies of self, skills of self management in contexts of crisis, are worthy in transforming mind into word/action; and word/action into a bright emotional event. It can determine the tone of an expression, vigour of the lines in a poem, freedom and ease of the organic form of a poem and the velocity of the flow of the life stream in a poem, using in an intimate throb of the poetic rhythm. This happens frequently in good poetry. The worldly veins of the lines are sprouting straight from a person requesting to God for a new birth with less brain and more heart. This is to stretch-out the individual self to the entire vastness of history and creative heritage .This I feel is the innermost drive of these poems. An essential request of a scientific/ philosophic mind to be blessed with a shift to a poet’s wind like mind. It can be praana or prachanda as the situation commands.


Personal is political in the world of ideologues. Here personal is poetical. Or personal is rather ethical/ spiritual. These poems reveal the insatiable urge of a mind to embrace the beloved life-scape; and to widen the circle of arms to embrace all, the whole. It reminds us of the spiritual wish of the protagonist of a Tagore poem to stretch it’s self on the banks of the river of time like a white dhoti. I enjoyed the twenty seven lights of these twenty seven poems as the silence of the stars from twenty seven depths of our everyday the sky. These lights are gentle torches of introspection and resurrection of the self. They are speaking the language of praying candles. They have a soft melody of love as their soul.

Prof. K. G. Sasnkara Pil

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

P O E M S



THE RACE FOR BIRTH

Dr T P Sasikumar



LIFE

of

LOVE

Dr T P Sasikumar

Published by : INDOLOGICAL TRUST, CALICUT


What is natural               . . . .   flows            . . . .   sooths         . . . .   elivates                 is P O E T R Y


Preface

I am not a poet. These poems constitute my profound thoughts on life during a year of solitude in Delhi. Few good friends, special are they, recognized these thoughts and encouraged me to instill life into them. So here they are in verse form.

One or two of these poems are published in Malayalam (translated from/to Malayalam). Acceptance of those Malayalam poems was the first encouragement for my continued writing.

The backing of my family and other well wishers is an integral part of this realization. My journey into the spiritual and literary path was motivated by my wife Dr P V Radhadevi. My sons S. Harikrishnan and S. Yadukrishnan are passionate readers of my work.

The realization and shaping of the poems were with the poetical support of Mrs. Sheeba Thattil. Especially valuable were the effort of Dr. Radhika Nagrath. My thanks are due to Prof. Akavoor Narayanan and Prof. KG Sankara Pillai for their comments and encouragement. Support and companionship of Panicker family at Delhi was a blessing. As usual, Mr. Sudhakaran of Indological Trust is with me.

As you peruse through these poems may you gain new perspectives on Life……

Dr T P Sasikumar

New Delhi,

26th January 2009.


Index

Preface by Dr T P Sasikumar

The little big ‘I’

  1. THE RACE FOR BIRTH
  2. FROM PHILOS TO AGAPE
  3. I NEED SOMEONE
  4. THE SECRET OF THE SELF
  5. SELF LOVE –TRUE LOVE

I wonder…I wish…

  1. THE UNDIVIDED EARTH
  2. WRITING THE SCRIPT FOR OTHERS
  3. DESIGNER AND ARCHITECT
  4. MARRIAGE AND MIS-MARRIAGE
  5. OPEN HEART SURGERY
  6. ARROW FROM THE SHADOW
  7. MISSION TO MOON AND MARS

From the deeper reserves

  1. THE MIRROR TO LIFE
  2. THE ELIXER OF LIFE
  3. HALF LIVED LIFE
  4. HEART FAILURE OF THE SPIRITUAL GURU

Oneness in love

  1. WE BECAME 'ONE'
  2. BETTER BE BLIND
  3. SABOTAGED RELATIONSHIPS
  4. WINTER’S RAIN
  5. THE RIVER OF LIFE
  6. GRACEFUL SURRENDER

Moving with the times

  1. GUARANTEED BLESSINGS

My heart aflame, just for you

  1. MY HEART THROBS FOR YOU
  2. IN SEARCH OF YOU, KRISHNA
  3. I MAY NEED YOU EVER MORE
  4. SOCIALIZING WITH GOD

Comments by

Prof. Akavoor Narayanan

Prof. K G Sankara Pillai

Dr. Radhika Nagrath


THE

LITTLE

BIG

‘I’


1. THE RACE FOR BIRTH

This is the story of my birth...
I fought with millions
Millions of my unborn brothers and sisters

I fought for life before my birth

My birth was a battle

Anyone could have received life

Instead of me

The sperms from my father

Fought to reach my mother’s egg

I was conceived
When I raced with many of my
Unborn brothers and sisters

I am the winner

In life I don’t have to struggle
As much as I have struggled for life

I am great and I believe in me
I can run and win the race

With anyone in this life
as I have won the race for birth.

---------------071120----------------

2. FROM PHILOS TO AGAPE


You have lived for twenty years

In this world of struggle and strife

Has it been a blow or a bloom?

You have tasted the joy of teenage

The wonders of philos and its thrills

In this world of rapture and delight

Have you welcomed its sorrows too?

You have learned the basic lesson

That life will never be the same

Will the future take its toll on you?

You have seen the world in harmony

Shared the dreams of an adult world

The wonders of eros and its ecstasy

Has your mission in life ever changed?

Step by step till you reach the stars

Life awaits you, accomplish and explore

As you discover the pleasure of life

In the wonders of absolute bliss

Add life to your years and years to life

You have journeyed from philos to agape

To arrive this moment of supreme love.

---------------081120----------------


3. I NEED SOMEONE



To learn, earn and attain fame

I deserted all

My home and all its affection

Every one so prized to me;

Earned, learned and achieved distinction

The mornings were bright

The days sunny and bright

The evenings gloomy

And the nights too chilly

I sat all alone

Wishing that some one

Would keep me company

And share my happiness in success!

My success was short lived

The happiness too,

Glittering memories faded

And retreated into nothingness;

Distinction adorned me no more

The mornings were bright

The days sunny and bright

The evenings gloomy

And the nights too chilly

Once again

I wished that someone

Would keep me company

And share my grief in failure!

I need someone

To keep me company

And be with me forever

In happiness and in sadness too!

---------- 080720 -----------


4. THE SECRET OF THE SELF


LIFE

Flowing river

Glowing spark

Sprouting seed

Ripening fruit

Merry going

Journey long

MIND

Maker of destiny

Breaker of agony

Source of Sorrow

Place of Joy

Freedom of love

Jail of bondage

GOD

Sweet friend

Creative Being

Ego-less human

Shapeless Being

Radiant Light

Purity of truth

SELF

Hiding within

Solitary and retiring

Rider and riding

Source and resource

Creator and destroyer

Life, Mind and God

---------- 080915 -----------


5. SELF LOVE – TRUE LOVE

A heart truly in love never loses hope

But believes in the promise of love

Love just grows, stops every tear

A word from the lips calms every fear

Love is a hunt for one

Who makes you smile

Listen to the silent heart

Let the love in you bloom full

Long the time and distance

Every form of intense love

Goes through a flow of tears,

Heartache and heavy pain

In love, plans fail and joy fades

Excitements vanish into air

In the end it's not how much you love

It's how much you hold back

Despite all the wrong

Learn to forgive and love again

Listen to the heart

Hear it say that love is silent

Life is a series of steps

Each step leading to joyful surprises

Some with happy conclusions

Let the love within guide you

Once you love yourself

It is a different thrill

All worries depart

Your love is fresh and fair

Build a creative life from self-love

With self-love one becomes lonely

A loneliness that brings

Happiness and bliss from within.

---------- 081012 -----------



I WISH…

I WONDER...
6. THE UNDIVIDED EARTH

If the whole human race disappears

From the worldly earth

Without the slightest trace

In a moment machines will run and burn

The trucks will hit and stop

Flying crafts will dash down

Within days, these places

Where I sat and slept

Will go to the ants and rats

In months my house and land

Will be free for cats and dogs

Let the animals enjoy!

The muddy heaps all around

With the earthy smell

Will cheer the plants

In years the trees will uproot

Buildings will collapse

Multi flats will become hillocks

Bridges will break down

Roads will become valleys

And metros will sink in water

Fish will swim free

In the streams on the street

In bliss of the new found land

The nice earth with no boundaries

Only rivers and mountains

Plants unshaved and untrimmed

Animals free with no belts and ties

Where pets and wild don't differ

And permitted to roam around free

With no humans around

The world has no name

Only the earthly life

GOD, grant me another birth

With less of brain

And more of heart

To live free and fair

To see the earth

As the undivided one!!!

------------071222-------------


7. WRITING THE SCRIPT FOR OTHERS

One evening in the temple

I heard the murmur of ladies

Who had gathered there

Their voices rising

Above the steady chant of prayers

‘Rajan should have stayed in the hostel

It is the best choice for him,

Nair could have left for Kerala

He is not comfortable here

Why should he continue to stay around?’

Nature too was not spared

‘If it would only rain’ they wished

‘The chilling cold would have decreased,

The storm is fierce,

Or else the cold would not be so bitter.’

Thus they relentlessly wrote

The script for other's lives.

‘Will someone write my script too?’

I wondered. But who would tell me

What will be drafted and written for me?

All of them busy prescribing

How the other should live

But none seemed interested

In writing a simple script

For ones own splendid life.

--------080126-------


8. DESIGNER AND ARCHITECT

'Feeding the poor,' a day of festivity

For the more fortunate me

I watch in amusement

As rice served in plates

Vanish into hungry mouths

Even before the curry arrives

'The hungry need no curry.'

Thus reads the loaded proverb.

The entreaty of the beggar for alms

From pavements and train stations

Blend with the heavy air,

My clever mind haunted by doubt

Searches for excuses;

The call of my heart too soft for my ear

The out-stretched arm, too dark to be seen.

Stretching his arms for alms

To the rich or poor he knows not

He surrenders his ego to ugly fate;

I strictly remind him

Of the meanness of his profession,

I order him not to beg in future;

My impoverished heart and mind

Do not wish to see his outstretched arms

Or listen to his insistent entreaty;

I watch him retreat in silence

To the order of despair.

I stand victoriously at the other end

Basking in the glory of my existence

Until the sad truth hits me;

I am the designer, and architect

Of the man I label 'the beggar.'

Who is real beggar here?

See me on the other side!

I am at this end

Not my choice

I am in this life

My name, fame, status, religion

Nothing is my choice

All the gift of someone!

---------080218-------


9. MARRIAGE AND MIS-MARRIAGE


'Carrying before marriage is a problem.'

A secret lay safe within her heart

Scenes from teenage flashed before her

Like flashes of lightening in a darkened sky

Abused by the man she knew from childhood

She lived with dread, haunted by horror

And powerless to express the revulsion, disgust

And trauma of that horror filled day.

Credit and debit are for the women.

'Not carrying after marriage is a problem.'

When 'colleague' was upgraded to 'spouse'

The initial fascination disappeared

Life took another harsh turn

Love became irksome and lethargic

Conversation got heated and annoyed,

Undesirable arguments became part of life

'Worry Invited For Ever’ became the WIFE.

Blessed are the gents with no balance sheet.

----------080306------------

10. OPEN HEART SURGERY


I would hide…

The Piggy Bank key,

Let none see it I hoped

I would hide…

Little precious gifts,

Let none see them I hoped

In a place where none will find

The hidden treasures of my life

I would hide…

Little trifles which I valued most,

My secrets rested safe

Within the innermost chamber

Of my precious heart,

As I grew in years

All that was hidden had a place

The key had a place

The lock had a place;

None could find the key

To the chamber of my heart

The safest hiding place,

Now the doctor says

He will open my heart

To remove a small block !

There are secrets

In my heart

That he must never find,

I would rather die

My secrets safe within me

Before I submit to

An open-heart surgery!

------ 080704 -------


11. ARROW FROM THE SHADOW


In one Janma you learn

And in the other you teach

Yogavasishta is the lecture

On dharma and mind management;

Rama was awarded eighteen days

In Thretha Yuga by Sage Vasishta

Krishna in Dwapara gave lessons

To Arjuna in the war field

Rama had a single wife in Sita

Who stood with him for all time

Krishna had many wives

His particular favourite, Radha

Who found herself abandoned too

Lakshmana the younger one

Also stood steadfast with Rama

Supporting him in dangerous times

Balarama, the elder one

Was always tormenting Krishna

Rama sent an arrow in the shadow

Which backfired to kill Krishna;

Each day you take birth

And in the next a rebirth

The karma you do in one Janma

An arrow from the shadow

Comes back in full force

To haunt you in the next Janma.

------080604------


12. MISSION TO MOON AND MARS

Plan the meeting

In Moon and Mars

Tags on other planets too

Have a package

Market this world

Get into closer ties

Find agents to talk

We must get business

Global to Solaral,

Schedule the lecture

East and west culture

Our immunization scheme

The trade and trends

Democracy and Kings

Mandela and Mahathma

Krishna and Rama

Tell them about Rishis

Introduce Communism

Teach them Harthal and Bandh

You could buy land

And stay there long

Plan an earth mission

Send your people here

Let me see your future

Will make an astro-chart

I find no chances for you

Your birth is in this Earth

These Ms can only influence

They can never bear you

Earth can’t spare you too!

--------081115-------


FROM

THE

DEEPER

RESERVES
13. THE MIRROR TO LIFE


Birth life and death

Are all within the mind

An intricate pattern

In the web of life,

When the mind is full

The world is full

When the mind empties

The world is empty too.

Desire is the craving of the mind

An empty vessel waiting to be filled,

Fantasies, dreams, imaginations and ideas

Immeasurable illusions, the product of the mind

Brim over the receptacle;

I wear my leather footwear

If I wish for a leather carpet

The serene agent, my dynamic mind

Transforms the thought, to suit my desire.

The mind is a mirror to life

Made by god never to be broken

Reflecting the wonders of life;

Achievements too are nearer

If you could only look within,

What is thought to be a mirage

Is well within our grasp;

Some struggle to clean the mirror

Flecked with dust and scratches

With cloth or polish both dirty and sandy

Making it more flawed than before;

But who will give me the magic formula

Powder, paper, polish or paint

To sparkle the mirror of my mind

With which I shall reflect the truth of the world

In its original immensity and magnitude.

---------- 080303---------


14. THE ELIXER OF LIFE



Unaware of the envious looks

Lovers smile at each other

The smile of praise, pleasure and pride

The beloved only too conscious

That the SMILE only means

Some Man In Life Enjoyment;

Change your life with a simple smile!

Rare are friends who make you smile

Pick your friends and the feel

Lend an ear, share a thought

Choose your way of happy life

Be with someone who makes you smile;

A means of turning the bitter to better

Your cheerful face, the best of cures

To cure the sorrow of sickness

And wipe away the poison of pain,

To soften the distressed heart

And make a dull day dazzling bright;

The way to be attractive is to adorn

The most gorgeous attire - the smile!

An inexpensive way to smarten looks

No coverage or network plight

No additional costs to be incurred

Smile-- the elixir nourishes life.

------------- 080317---------------


15. HALF LIVED LIFE


Many a time I have suffered loneliness

And feared the onslaught of isolation

Afraid of ridicule my face lost its charm

Fear of failure impelled me

To abandon brighter options at hand

Half my life is ended before I learn

That what I have lived until now

Is not a meaningful life!

On this bright and sunny day

I resolve to start afresh and live it anew

Yet again I am in search for new meaning in life

No longer will I distress myself

No more of gloom do I see

But the stars in the heavens glaze for me

I believe that I will gain wisdom today

The search comes to a standstill

With the discovery of the self

I have learned to feel affection for myself

To trust myself to be fearless in life

I have learned to be grave to achieve distinction

I have rejected habits to be faultless

To live longer than my habits sought

Growing old while still in youth

Climbing the ladder to an ideal life

The future gazes at me, dazzling and attractive

But this is short-lived happiness too!

On second thoughts I wonder

If living long is thrilling and pleasurable;

My greatest effort to attain wisdom

Crashes to a sudden halt even before it begins

'No pain no gain' goes the proverb.

Make it short and joyful too

Take of life what it gives to you

Burn yourself in the joy of life

From the embers into a glowing flame

The notion 'truth shall prevail' strikes me hard

Truth follows falsehood as sunlight the dark;

But love is untruthful dictates the brain,

A late realisation for my reluctant heart

Causes me grave pain within

I deem change to be the outcome of destiny

Change makes me beautiful too

From pupa to larva, a beautiful butterfly

Through the stages of metamorphosis

To the glory of dappled dyed flight

'Change is the only thing with no change'

Is a thought that brings no more cheer

Life is too brief, reminds the brain

The heart thus fears to acknowledge beauty

In the short changing span of life

The ray of hope I saw is no more

When this bright day comes to a close

I return to the sordid gloom of where I began,

Half my life is lived only to learn

I have not lived a meaningful life!

----------- 080322-------------


16. HEART FAILURE OF THE SPIRITUAL GURU

In the centre of the heart only Brahman exists

No shape, no pace, no sound and space

All empty with fullness in emptiness

God wrote the laws of the spirit in the heart

Look, listen and trust your heart

Meditate for a strong heart

It is not the body's posture

But the attitude of the heart

That counts for the health of the heart

There is only feeling within the heart

Relations or conflicts are at the mind level

Break your relation-ship to flow free

Don't break your heart for relations

Be with one that makes your heart smile

A simple smile gladdens everyone's heart

Open your heart for experiences

Don't create wounds in your hearts

Or in the hearts of others too

Move through life with lightness

Touching the hearts of others

All are happy when the Guru is around

With all their troubles they go to him

Life is smooth for all and Guru is free

In faithful love he loses the self

Gives his heart to be left heartless

In the dreary hospital room

Someone held the Guru's hand

To check his pulse beat

Every disaster gives heartache

Rapid uneven and pounding

Disasters are natural in life

Opens his eyes to discern a nurse

'Your heart beat is normal

Nothing to fear,

I was your student too.

I remember your words'

"Take time to find the beauty

In the things that you see

Take life's simple pleasures

Let them set your heart free"

Only the ceiling and the light above

Murmur of the nurses around

Groaning of death- in beds nearby

The ICU smells of death and looks scary

The Guru now longs to be with some one

His heart starts to pound and race in panic

Eyes close to slide into unconsciousness

If not in life, at least at the time of death

He wishes for the hand of a loved one.

His heart is broken in panic and fear.

---------- 080915 -----------



ONENESS

IN

LOVE


17. WE BECAME 'ONE'


We talked and talked

About everything,

About searching, hoping,

Waiting and knowing

There could be a different life

Days and nights passed;

After a while our lives converged

And we became part

Of each other's story

We thought we could

Go together all the way,

Being with each other;

The path we found together

Was not wide enough for two

So we parted different ways

Our hearts felt panic,

Throbbing swollen pain

We promised never to look back;

As we grew we learned the truth

We could never stay apart for long

We abandoned the old wounds

Time would heal them, we said

There must be different roads

We can meet along from time to time;

Rather than be 'two'

On one single road

We decided to be 'one'

On two separate roads

And we became part

Of each other's story.

---------- 080708 -----------


18. BETTER BE BLIND


It was a rich experience

Of total blindness,

We held each other's hand

So tight when in love,

Afraid of losing the other

Isolated in a world of our own

We had eyes only for each other…

In a world of dreams

We lived blissfully…

Marriage gifted me

A different experience,

Real life came in its turn

The family grew in size,

I needed to be out alone

To have my life in place

Now I learnt the supreme truth…

Love was blind

Marriage an eye opener…

Get married…

Close your eyes…

Love the spouse…

Better be blind !

---------- 080820 -----------


19. SABOTAGED RELATIONSHIPS


There are moments

When relationships

Are sabotaged,

Learn to perceive LIFE

With amazement,

Not in shock;

Observe the delight in

Diversity,

Drudgery,

Entertain the wonders

Of Contrasts

Don't kill it with

Cynicism,

Criticism;

Enjoy its awesome appeal

Tackle it with the heart

Relate it to love,

Open your eyes

To appreciate the beauty

In a different reality

--------- 081124 -----------


20. WINTER’S RAIN

To dampen the joy of festive life

Comes the chill of winter

Drowsy winter waits longingly

For the rays of the sun

On almost vacant roads

Gloomy men walk

Heads covered with scarves and caps

With hands in their pockets

Feet tightened within

The warm comfort of their shoes

Frost bitten faces and cracked fingers

Exposed to the cold

Suffer the ravages of the cold wave

And some submit to the agony of death.

The winter rain is only a dream

For the growing girl

She dreamt of the brighter days

The sunlight streaming down

But there was no respite

For the chilling cold

She hid behind her scarf

Shutting the whole world

Out of her life

She waited the endless wait

Dreaming of sunshine

Dreaming of rain.

It came to an end this endless wait

With the coming of the sun

The rays of the glittering sun

Fought to pierce the heavy clouds

Then they fell those tiny drops

Until they drenched the dry earth

She held her hands

To catch the falling drops of rain

The first touch of her lover

Until drenched with love

In the falling winter rain

Her first love.

-----080208------


21. THE RIVER OF LIFE

Born to wild mountains

They flow through valleys

Waiting patiently in ditches

Gradually filling up

To flow down the slope,

They flow into the ocean

Forgoing their identity

To the surging waves

They know no life, but 'surrender'

A blind surrender, to change,

Life-Giver and Harmonizer

Every moment is prized

In its dynamic or static state

From the River of life

To the Ocean of love.

---------- 081110 -----------


22. GRACEFUL SURRENDER


Life is surrounded by graceful surrender

Nature too is not spared

Geese surrender to the first autumn chills

And consider flying south

Flowers surrender to the night

The setting sun surrenders

To the horizon of another day

A mother surrenders

To the needs of her baby

The child surrenders

To the wisdom of the father

Friends’ surrender to each other

Lovers surrender to moments of desire

Love surrenders to society and pride

Partners surrender to a stable family

Surrender to job for the sake of earning

Surrendering views fearing others around

Life surrenders to death with no choice

Surrender so sweet beautiful and natural

As the flow of the river;

Graceful movements in a dance

The subtle symphony of life

As one surrenders the mind

To god in all empty moments

Attaining the best in harmony with the self.

---------- 081111 -----------



MOVING

WITH

THE

TIMES


23. GUARANTEED BLESSINGS

I left this lovely land

Twenty years ago-a land

Filled with Gods' blessings

Gods who belonged to us

Or did we belong to them?

Lighted lamps in the dusk

Accompanied by evening chants

Portals of houses adorned with

"Om Namo Narayanaya" or

"Jesus blesses this home"

Picture of Mecca in some others,

But buses were secular

Carrying all the gods in an array

And some buses carried boards

Attributing its glory to GOD.

In the early nineties

On my short visits

I learned that life and lifestyle

Had changed over the years

In Gods own Country,

The lighted lamps were now off

Pooja places moved aside

No 'keerthans' and 'bhajans'

No one had time to 'waste'

Each one totally occupied

The TV awarded the prime place,

Buses ran with film songs

Music system in full-blare

Picking up the passengers

Enjoying the drive and the ride.

As the new century rolls in

I am back on a visit, expectations anew

To see the 'splendid' speedy change

God (wo)men on the campaign

"You may identify with any God"

Each swami(ni) has his/her own

Full-time Telecast Channels

Ladies are full-timers

Gents have some leisure

Spirituality can be purchased

Both as wholesale and retail

Buses have boards-- 'blessed by…'

Safety of the trip-- 'sponsored by…'

People feel happy and safer still

Everything is taken care of.

Where did the traditional god go

Giving way to the human gods?

Gods who give blessings

Are as per your payment

Money back scheme too

Guaranteed blessings!!

--------080602----------


MY

HEART

AFLAME

JUST

FOR

YOU


24. MY HEART THROBS FOR YOU


I love you

I miss you

I respect you

Count on me

I understand you

I will be there for you.

They prayed for courage

Imagined it to be a weapon

With which all evil can be defeated

But that was only a mental state

They searched for love

Imagined it could be bought

With which they could gain happiness

But that was only a mental state

They craved to manipulate God somehow

Imagined a superb existence in this world

With which their desires could be attained

But he is the being within:

Many come to you for favours from you

I love you god not for those

But you gave me a heart

That throbs for you

The most powerful force in me

Seen only with the inner eye

Is it your great love and concern

That you have gifted me?

Though you do not appear in person

You always get to me

Through messengers in disguise

And you affectionately assure me

I love you

I miss you

I respect you

Count on me

I understand you

I will be there for you.

-------- 080308-----------


25. IN SEARCH OF YOU, KRISHNA


My search begins through you

To find YOU and to end in YOU.

In search of you Krishna, once more

I depend on you to help me find you

You came into this world in diverse forms

Fish, tortoise and pig to save our Devi Earth

From the pillar, as Narasimham you came

To fight against Hiranya for Prahalada,

Granted salvation to the devil King Mahabali

Incarnating as the dwarf Vamana

You came as Ram the apprentice of Siva

Kshathriya-Brahmana with an axe in hand

You came as Sri Rama, the man of dharma

Always believing that truth should triumph

Your childhood was well spent, Oh Krishna

Balarama your playmate, the plough your toy

And while you wait for your tenth avatar

I am reminded of the stories of your birth

Did you come as Siddhartha, the Buddha?

Parting with Yasodhara to love this world?

Chances are sparse for you to have done that

As you were Seetharaman and Radhakrishnan

Did you come to this earth as Christ?

Sankara, Baapu, Baba, Guru or Amma?

Neither seeing the fullness in them, to believe

Nor a creative style as in the other nine.

Is it only a joke that you are 'Kali'

That created Valmiki and Vyasa?

Your story enacted in a single location

Was recorded by them in separate books

When you reincarnate for the tenth time

Whom have you chosen to write about you?

Where do I begin from the huge heap of books?

What shall I read and in which language?

In which continent do I search for you, Krishna?

In what form are you with us today?

Who is the teller of your story?

You are the only one who can help me

My search begins through you

To find YOU and to end in YOU.

---------------080510-------


26. I MAY NEED YOU EVER MORE

I was with you

In your childhood
To see all the wonders

That you've never seen,

I was with you

On that moonlit night

You were in my arms

Crossing the river in the heavy rain,

I danced with you

You held me tight
Swaying to the rhythm

Of your special song.

You did not see me

As I shared my days with you
For you were too busy

Playing with loved ones,
I laughed with you

And your brother

At the tricks you played

On your uncle too,

I heard the secrets

You shared with your friend

I was happy that you ate

The food I carried for you.

I want to dream with you

Of things yet to come

Awaiting the days of joy
And the beauty of life,

I want to cry with you

When life gets too tough

To find comfort in you

When times get too rough,
I want to share with you

Every moment of my life

All the joy and sorrow

Until the end of life.

I have found a love

That has just begun

And as I live my life ahead

I may need you ever more.

--------080520---------------


27. SOCIALIZING WITH GOD


The best place to socialize is the temple;

I have established contacts, larger in number

During the short span of my stay here

But I am aware of the perceptive looks

Of some who look at me, amazed

Wondering at the speed of increase

Of friends and acquaintances

From all walks of life.

I was absent from the temple one day,

The next day I was greeted with a query

'Why were you not here yesterday?'

I looked at the idol in the temple

And pointing to him in all earnestness

In answer I told him, that no one sees

Or cares to seek what is there to seek

The presence of the all-pervading God;

He exalts in your presence

Expects the same from you too!

Begin to converse with him

He will spot you among the crowd

Will love you in a very special way;

I socialize, with God these days

Through whom I hope to reach out

To the people I meet at the temple

Have you never searched for him?

Have you not experienced his love for you?

----------080627-----------


Dr. Radhika Nagrath

Dr Radhika Nagarath was introduced to me by Mrs. Ajitha and Mrs. Josmi from Trichur around 2007 mid, in connection to the editing work of my book “LIFE made SIMPLE”.

I know Dr. Radhika as a devotee of Vivekananda and have a poetical mind. Her study on Vivekananda as a poet resulted in an acclaimed book “……”.

Dr Radhika is educated in English Literature ……….. and now working with Swamy Ram Dev at his Ashram at Haridwar.

I requested for commentary on the poems, Dr.Radhaka helped me in formatting them and gave these comments. Later I met her on 17th January 2009 at Haridwar for the first time.


Comments by Dr. Radhika Nagrath

1. THE RACE FOR BIRTH

The positive attitude towards life depicted in the lines above strongly motivates us to move ahead in life in spite of all odds. The biggest struggle of winning over the competent brothers and sisters in the mother’s womb, who could have taken birth, is already over. The poet inspires that if we have won in the race of birth successfully, why can’t we win in life too? He exhorts a common man to believe in oneself and come out triumphant in life.

2. FROM PHILOS TO AGAPE

Each age has its own charms and lessons to give. Growing from teen to twenty the writer has also realized the blows and blooms.

3. I NEED SOMEONE

Life is all about sharing the joys and sorrows. There should be someone in life with whom one can share. The poet longs for a true companion.

4. THE SECRET OF THE SELF

The Self encompasses all, viz. life, mind and God. In very few simple words, the poet explicates the trio through the Self.

5. SELF LOVE – TRUE LOVE

Love of the Self is the true love because it rightly guides the life of a person. This loving of the Self is not fanning the lower ego or self that binds but with the higher self that liberates us.

6. THE UNDIVIDED EARTH

The poet’s imagination is a place somewhat like Utopia, where there will be no bindings. Animals move free, so does the man; the creatures are not captured for any commercial use.

The more the modern man has grown in knowledge, more boundaries he has created around himself. Emotions are left far behind and intellect rules the way. In this poem, the poet’s sensibility can be likened to a great philosopher thinker of the 19th c. Swami Vivekananda. He says at one point in his life that he wishes to unlearn what all he had learnt in a lifetime. The modernization and material growth seems weighty to most of the men of heart.

7. WRITING THE SCRIPT FOR OTHERS

A common observation at community places especially at places of worship and contemplation like temples and churches is that people visit the holy premises but get engaged in mundane talks. They are whole-heartedly involved in discussing about weather and events of the lives of others. Sarcastically Sasi Kumar says, “Will someone write my script of life too?”

The poem is a satire on our common wasteful talks prescribing the key to happiness in each other’s lives whereas each one of us has to write the script of our lives ourselves. Whatever we think, that we act, and so we become. No one else has right to perform our karmas.

8. DESIGNER AND ARCHITECT

Somewhere down the line if we analyse the existing social and economic disparity in life, it is we alone who are responsible for that. If each one of us shares the burden then this disparity in the world can be lessened. Everyone on this earth must be given a chance to prove himself. The poet owes himself responsible for the suffering in the world. The world could be a better place if each of us undertook the responsibility. The poet owns the responsibility that he is the maker of the beggar next door portraying his heights of modesty through this poem.

9. MARRIAGE AND MIS-MARRIAGE

To fulfill her role of motherhood, it’s the woman who is to be blamed ever for carrying or not carrying. In this male dominated society, man has kept himself safe on all fronts. His balance sheet of credits and debits, assets and liabilities boils down to the perfect figure - Nil. Man has always been a crafty accountant in his married life.

10. OPEN HEART SURGERY

The life’s secrets die with a person sealed in the heart of a man. The inner chamber of one’s heart is the safest place where no one else can have access until we allow ourselves. The love for our God must be kept safe in that chamber. The poet wishes to leave this earth with his secrets hidden without anyone having access to the inner realms of his heart.

11. ARROW FROM THE SHADOW

As you sow, so shall you reap; the poet asserts through this poem. The force with which an arrow is shot or the ball is thrown comes back to us with an equal and opposite force. It is the nature’s law. No one can escape the law of karma. What we do today is bound to come back to us in this life or another.

12. MISSION TO MOON AND MARS

Being a space scientist, the poet’s infatuation with moon and mars can never be withdrawn. He foresees the time when people will plan their holidays and get together on other planets but ties with heavenly earth can never be broken.

13. THE MIRROR OF LIFE

The guy in the mirror hints to me to keep my mind’s mirror sparkling clean. The whole world is reflected in the mind’s mirror. But is it an easy task? Nay, the poet says that who will give me the magic formula to tame this mind and keep it ever sparkling for the reflecting the truth of life.

14. THE ELIXIR OF LIFE

A smile can go a long way in brightening someone’s life. That face is incomplete which doesn’t wear a smile. Without an extra cost, it enriches the both receiver and the giver. So whenever one dresses up to start his day, the first thing to check is, “Are you wearing a smile?” And the friends who make you smile are to be cherished for long, feels the poet.

15. HALF LIVED LIFE

The realization that major portion of life has been spent in stupendous affairs, comes to a very few. Most of us feel contented having had a good career and living. But is that the real purpose of life?

16. HEART FAILURE OF THE SPIRITUAL GURU

The seat of all emotions, heart is an important part of the body where the Absolute (Brahman) exists. ‘Hriday kamal’ (the lotus heart) of the devotee is the place where the deity resides. So never hurt the soft organ, cautions the poet. With the stopping of the heart, the life stops too. Even if the beats of the heart of spiritual guru stop, his words echo in the ears long after.

17. WE BECAME ‘ONE’

With maturity of age comes wisdom. All strives and struggles of life come to an end with egos dissolved and the two lovers become one.

18. BETTER BE BLIND

It is sometimes better to shut our eyes and accept gladly the follies of each other in a married life. Loving unconditionally is the key to a successful married life, feels the poet.

19. SABOTAGED RELATIONSHIPS

Blessed are the adversities of life for they teach us how to live in life. Criticism and blames inflicted are in fact a boon that cut and polish us. One must learn to be happy and enjoy every moment of life, says the poet.

20. WINTER’S RAIN

In this poem, the poet has caught the beautiful somber feelings which one experiences in life. After a long wait, our cherished dreams come true and the joy derived from those wishful moments which come after a long struggle are like the light shower and glittering sun after the chilly winter. Every cloud has a silver lining and so is the every dark event of life.

21. THE RIVER OF LIFE

Reading the poem I am reminded of Ramakrishna Paramhansa, the chief mentor of Swami Vivekananda who gives a beautiful explication of Absolute and its manifestation (Purusha and Prakriti). He says that the Absolute, when in static form, is Purusha, the causal agent of this whole universe and when in dynamic form manifesting the changes, is Prakriti. In this river of life, Prakriti plays in different forms and ultimately unites with the Absolute. Just as the river, merges with the ocean and thus becomes complete, same way we all are flowing in this river of life and keep on evolving in every birth till we become complete and are liberated.

22. GRACEFUL SURRENDER

To gain in life, one needs to surrender. To move on in life, surrender is mandatory; to harmonies in life, surrender is the only key. Let go your mind and your thoughts and be empty for a while. That is the only mantra of success and joy. So surrender at will otherwise nature herself forces you to surrender on day, says the poet.

23. GUARANTEED BLESSINGS

Visiting his homeland after a gap of few years, the poet is caught in between two cultures; one that he has left behind and the other that has become dominant. He receives a culture shock when he sees spirituality being marketed. The “traditionalist” poet finds himself as an alien amongst his own country people. He sees everything from the past lens and is grieved. In a satire he says that are the blessings also guaranteed in this age of warranty?

24. MY HEART THROBS FOR YOU

My Lord! My heart throbs only for you and not for your benedictions and gifts. And this pining for you is also a gift from you, says the poet. He says to the lord that if he can feel for Him, it’s because He has bestowed on Him the real heart that craves not for earthly love but love ethereal only.

25. IN SEARCH OF YOU, KRISHNA

The poem is soaked deep in Indian mythology. Only Lord can tell His means, as mysterious are the ways of God. In what form and where will the Lord incarnate, He only can predict. Where can we mortal beings search for Him? He only can know whom Lord himself lets know, says the poet.

26. I MAY NEED YOU EVER MORE

Devotees look upon their deity, Lord Krishna, in many ways. One of the ways of expression is Sakhya Bhav in which the devotee talks to the beloved Lord as a friend, sharing with Him every moment of his life. This friendship with the Lord is the only true friendship and eternal.

27. SOCIALISING WITH GOD

Every act done with realization of God becomes fulfilling, even the act of socializing. When we are socializing with the Creator, His Creation automatically comes in our purview or social circle. We need not make any special effort for that. Through Him, one can reach out everyone.